The Presence Process starting all over again.
Today is the day. it was a beautiful day, a perfect day! No appointments, no filled time slots in my calendar, just a plain old Sunday, with chocolate croissants (the best in town from Renaud’s) and a decaf latte. Sunshine and Summerland beach. Maja playing in the sand building the most giganting sand mountain in the world and me reading the book again.
I finished my first round of reading and working through it yesterday evening with the words: “by sharing our present moment awareness, we know that God is love. Then, and only then are we being responsible with the gift of life.” (Michael Brown)
Do I feel like I have gained more present moment awareness since I first started with this process? The answer is yes. I have moments where I catch myself totally trapped by thought. I catch myself and the next moment I am watching a picture being drawn, a butterfly crossing the loan, a spider weaving it’s web…
And then I am back I thought.
Would I like to be more present yet?
You bet. That’s what this second round is all about. So today I started with beginners mind. Michael Brown the discoverer of this process, developed it in response of him being diagnosed with an incureable disease which caused him tremendous agony for almost 10 years of his life. He had been living in happy unawareness before at age 25 he crumbled down in pain for the first time.
His healing journey led him from allopathic medicine to alternative treatments, always seeking cure outside of himself. Only when the South African born moved to San Francisco in 1996 it dawn on him that the answer lay inside of him. On several occasions he experienced present moment awareness, during these connected moments his pain was gone.
These occasions set him on a path, in search of a tool that would help accumulate present moment awareness without mind altering substances or outside help.
One of the profound insights I gained from my reading today was a truth Michael shares in his first chapter.
This insight is that there is nothing really to heal about us. It is our experience that needs healing. We, our being is perfect, whole and complete.
It is only our experience that has gotten out of balance, whether we experience physical, emotional, financial or mental pain.
So remembering this insight I am letting go of wanting to heal or change myself. I invite you to do the same. I am committing thought to healing my life experience and restore balance.
I will know that this is accomplished when money and low self esteem is not an “issue” anymore, when I will be teaching, and traveling and doing “my work”.
How about you? When will you know that balance has been restored in your experience?